Advisor Perspectives welcomes guest contributions. The views presented here do not necessarily represent those of Advisor Perspectives
Q3 2019 hedge fund letters, conferences and more
Click here to watch a video and learn more about Evidence Based Advisor Marketing.
I like to think I’ve learned from my mistakes. I’ve made plenty of them. Recently, I reflected on what’s worked and what hasn’t. Here are two rules that have endured.
Rule no. 1
As advisors, you’re often the center of attention. Perhaps you have written a book or sponsored events. You’re accustomed to speaking authoritatively to small and large groups of people. You’re respected – and rightfully so – for your expertise and integrity. It’s easy to believe you are “special” and at the center of everyone’s thoughts, which brings me to my first rule: It’s not about me.
In his blog post, The Paradoxical Power of Humility, Dr. Karl Albrecht set forth some important observations about humility. In his view, humility is a state of mind where we all are, “just as valuable as every other human being on the planet, no more and no less.”
Achieving this state of mind requires us to disconnect our “competitive reflex,” which is challenging. When you have achieved a certain status in life, it is tempting to believe you “know the way.” This attitude manifests itself by giving unsolicited advice and habitually redirecting the conversation back to yourself.
Albrecht asks these questions: If someone tells a joke, do you feel compelled to top it with a better one? Or, do you hold back on laughing, so the joke falls flat? Do you always have a better story, a better example, a better suggestion, or a better solution? Do you feel compelled to demonstrate how smart you are, or how much you know?
It’s counter-productive to react that way. You want others to feel, “affirmed, appreciated, encouraged, validated, and psychically nourished.” They won’t feel that way if you engage in conduct that focuses on you and ignores or trivializes them.
It’s easy to fall into this trap. You want to demonstrate your “value.” You may honestly believe you know what’s best for your client within and outside areas of your core competence.
I have a simple metric I use as a check on my behavior. How much am I talking? The more I talk, the less likely it is that I’m focusing on the other person.
Read the full article here by Dan Solin, Advisor Perspectives
